Both men & women need love & respect
Yes, you heard right! Both men and women need love and respect. We need to say it again and again, because of an unfortunate theory that has influenced a lot of people. Psychologists eventually proved it wrong, but not before it had caused harm to many relationships.
We all Need Respect
Giving unwanted advice, criticising or talking down to your spouse if disrespectful, regardless of gender!
Instead of giving unwanted advice, when your spouse has a problem, listen without trying to fix. Only give advice when he/she specifically asks for it.
If you have unmet needs, aim to express them without criticism. Just use “I feel” and “I need” statements. You will get much better results if you try this.
When you disagree about something, do so respectfully as equals. Don’t talk down to your spouse as if they are inferior. Don’t assume that anyone who disagrees with you is less intelligent.
We all Need Love
Not listening, being selfish or acting distant to your spouse is unloving, regardless of gender!
Instead of blocking your ears when your partner speaks, listen to their point of view. Aim to understand what they are saying. If they are expressing their emotions, empathise and validate so that he/she feels heard.
Try not to be selfish in your relationship. Use “we” instead of “I” when talking about your plans. Include your partner and always ask his/her input and opinion.
If you are acting distant to punish your spouse, aim instead to have an emotion based conversation where you both express your points of view. Again LISTEN!
Nobody should be disrespected and nobody should feel unloved in a marriage. So let me repeat myself. Both men and women need love and respect in equal measures.
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